I can't believe I forgot *this* one...
Oct. 9th, 2005 07:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fiberaddictOK, I was tired last night. I was concerned about the pending war...but *this* story needs to be told. (Sorry, S., but it *is* funny!)
Call it What Not To Wear when you are Over 20 and (massively) overweight. :shudder:
So, we're sitting in the tent, keeping our eyes on Keith, when we see this......woman.......heading down Clan Alley. She is 40-ish, maybe older, and was quite hard to miss: she was wearing Neon Pink and Bright Purple tunic-ish thing and split pants. (I *think* the tunic was pink and the pants (what there was of them) were purple. I have tried *really*really* hard to block it out of my mind...)
blink. She was *really* bright. She got closer....and we noticed that the tunic was split from the knee-length hem to the waistband. O...K. Then we noticed that the pants were split from the top of her knee-high boots to.....the waistband. And she wasn't wearing any noticable thing Under Them.
At all.
:shudder:
She went through the breezeway next to the scout tent and disappeared, and I tried to force the vision from my head. Cellulite should not be displayed that blatently.
Wait - it gets worse! About an hour or so later, she walks past the side of our tent...about 8 feet from me, right as I am looking that way. :shudder: It was MUCH worse close up.
I immediately made our token kilt wearer stand up and swagger for me to wash my eyes out...it Did help. *g*
It is said that the expression on my face was priceless......
Call it What Not To Wear when you are Over 20 and (massively) overweight. :shudder:
So, we're sitting in the tent, keeping our eyes on Keith, when we see this......woman.......heading down Clan Alley. She is 40-ish, maybe older, and was quite hard to miss: she was wearing Neon Pink and Bright Purple tunic-ish thing and split pants. (I *think* the tunic was pink and the pants (what there was of them) were purple. I have tried *really*really* hard to block it out of my mind...)
blink. She was *really* bright. She got closer....and we noticed that the tunic was split from the knee-length hem to the waistband. O...K. Then we noticed that the pants were split from the top of her knee-high boots to.....the waistband. And she wasn't wearing any noticable thing Under Them.
At all.
:shudder:
She went through the breezeway next to the scout tent and disappeared, and I tried to force the vision from my head. Cellulite should not be displayed that blatently.
Wait - it gets worse! About an hour or so later, she walks past the side of our tent...about 8 feet from me, right as I am looking that way. :shudder: It was MUCH worse close up.
I immediately made our token kilt wearer stand up and swagger for me to wash my eyes out...it Did help. *g*
It is said that the expression on my face was priceless......
