Random Ramblings...

[fiberaddict]

Lots of introspective here lately. I've been...not pushed, really, but encouraged to collect Torah commentaries. It's weird, and cool...and I don't know *why*, but I'm going along with it. The reading is fascinating, that's for sure! (Mostly Rashi, but I have a copy of "The Woman's Haftarah Commentary", by a collection of women Rabbis, and I just found a copy of "The Woman's Torah Commentary" on ebay. Interesting...) I *need* to find one on the Psalms, but I can't find one in my price range (under $40. I like cheap......so I'll keep looking)

We've been all out of sorts this week. Sniping at each other, snarky, bad humored (BEFORE my accident, so that's not it). Very weird....we're all on edge.

Haven't had bad dreams, just *weird* ones. Last night was a sort-of Rapture; I was watching everybody else go *poof* while I was stuck in...some sort of force-field that kept me on the ground. I told myself in the dream that it was a trick to shake my faith - how weird is THAT? I mean, analyzing dreams WHILE I'm having them? I don't even want to KNOW what that might mean......

Finger: the nerve block is gone, but it only hurts when I bump the tip. Typing is problematical - I have to use the pad of that finger, and that's not normal. It's amazing how many times I bump my finger tips.....

Michael's offers 15% off to teachers, including Homeschoolers, but you have to show proof (I used my HSLDA card), and there's no card - you have to request it (and show proof) each time you shop. Not very user-friendly, but 15% off helps. (Why yes, I went there yesterday....they had all Cannon Art pads buy one, get one free. Unadvertised...I went in for Herself. We are set on art paper now, I think.....)

I feel like I'm in limbo right now. Some stuff I have to do, other stuff (that really needs doing) I *can't* do. More odd-ness.....seems to be the story of my life right now.

Need to hit the grocery store...we're out of easy-to-fix stuff. And breakfast stuffs. And I want to get one of those finger-protector thingys to help keep me from bashing my fingertip into things.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I feel like a cow in a cattle chute. "You're going this way now". "Um, k?" "And now you'll do *This*". Yes, there are resolutions percolating through, reflection... but even the *idea* that I'm in charge of my next month is laughable.

-Hearth

[(Anonymous)]

Because I don't want to announce it to the world (LOL) via FB or my blog... today's cattle chute moment was buying the first new car I've ever owned. Simultaneously, BFF bought a new car, different town. It *needed* to happen before the first. Don't ask me why. But it did. (I have a whole long story about how this happened, and the chuting, but enough comment blogging. ;) )

[fiberaddict]

Congratulations! Enjoy the new-car smell - it doesn't last long! :grin:

aNNa says:

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know what I think or feel. Every few moments, I'm crying out as Tamar to Judah: How can I plead every moment if you have left me here among so many distractions? I cannot help that I need to eat, to clean, to take care of a husband and children, to cook, to deal with bills and the things of this world! I am NOT unfaithful! I simply need rescue. I think of the woman in the NT that drove the man crazy asking and asking and asking for what she wanted until he finally gave in just to get her to shut up.

I am wrestling against myself mightily. One moment I'm angry because He isn't come, the next I'm telling myself He isn't going to come, the next I'm chastizing myself for considering Him failed before the time is even up. It's a disaster, in my head.

Today's parsha is weird. When Jacob sees Joseph after twenty-two years... what he says is just crazy. I can't make heads or tails of it, and it just makes me more frustrated.

And NOBODY reminded me that tonight is the last Shabbat of 2011... and I had planned to go out to eat, and could've gone last night, instead, but didn't realize, and now it's too late, and I don't want to be gone during the last Shabbat meal. More frustration. Mostly with myself.

Re: aNNa says:

[fiberaddict]

:hugs: I keep reminding myself He is in control, and in the parable of the 10 Viegins, He tarried.

I also have to remind myself to not try and put Him in a box......He's more awesome than I can imagine.

Re: aNNa says:

[(Anonymous)]

-huge hugs-

He's got some plans going. What they are, He knows. He loves you. It *will* be for good.

-more hugging-

- Hearth